Monday 15 November 2010

Staying Motivated Part Two: Getting off those Sticky Floorboards

In a previous article we investigated the power of building a magnetic future in getting yourself motivated. If you know which mountain you want to climb, and can really see, taste and feel what it's like to get to the top, then you'll plough through difficulties to get there.

But what if you just can't get started? If you know where you want to go, but your magnetic future isn't pulling you anywhere. If that's so, it looks like you have a tricky case of Sticky Floorboards - you're glued to the spot, expecting to get started any second, but never quite managing it.
Sir, Madam, it looks like you need to call in the experts.

Sticky floorboards are perfectly normal and can show up in any situation from 'meaning to tell that colleague how rude they're being,' to 'meaning to quit my terrible job and do something I actually like.' But, without moving, you're going to stay in exactly the same place. Let me share with you three remedies for Sticky Floorboard syndrome.
1) Put aside expectations of how you should behave.
One of the top reasons for staying stuck to your floorboards is old ideas of how you're supposed to act, think and speak. We shape so much of our lives around what other people tell is is sensible and how we think other people would like us to act. This can paralyse you from seeing different ways of doing things. These are old ideas that may have served you until now, but if you want to move towards the summit of your mountain, you will need new ways of doing things.

Ask yourself: in which parts of my life does the fear of how I should behave keep me stuck? Look for hidden beliefs you hold, like "I want people to like me" or "A secure job and a pension is more important than my immediate happiness." And when you've identified your beliefs of how you should behave, get beyond your sticky floorboards by asking yourself this critical question....


"What would I do if I didn't have to be normal?"

The answer to this question is the key to you taking ownership of your own next steps, rather than relying on the advice or opinions of others. This is about giving yourself permission to act differently.

2) Make it Delightful!
If permission to act differently isn't your problem, it could be that you're stuck because you lack the energy to get going. If climbing your mountain makes you feel a bit flat,
remedy 2 is the one for you. To scale any mountain you need to feel fully pumped with energy and committed to charging forwards. This is much, much easier if the next thing you're going to do sounds delightful to you.

SARK's Wheel of Delight is a specially - built tool to help people get moving when they want to make something happen in their life. I recommend you read this article to get to grips with this simple and delightful technique:
Happiness Exercise 4: The Wheel of Delight.

3) Drop Mr & Mrs Logical
If we think too much, we can 'logic' ourselves into the fear of taking a next step. Let's take a look at Imaginary Dave who's are afraid of public speaking. The more Imaginary Dave thinks about doing a talk in public, the more he sees what can go wrong. He'll forget his words, he won't be able to answer a question, he'll boring people, he'll trip up on a power cable.... the list of potential pitfalls is endless. Soon, he's investigated so many negative scenarios that failure becomes the only possible option.

What's more, Imaginary Dave thinks he's being logical throughout this process, so he convinces himself it's not possible for him to speak in public. Fact. Whereas, if he just got up and did it, he'd see that he can do it.

Dropping Mr & Mrs Logical is about stopping the thoughts that stick us to the floorboards and just get moving. Simple as that - one foot in front of the other. Because, as we all know, if you never do anything, nothing ever gets done. So... Give yourself permission to do something different, make it delightful and just do it!

Good luck!


Further Reading
See Part 1: Building a Magnetic Future
Part 3. Vanquishing Vampires and Ducking Demons
Video Blog: How to be more motivated

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This article is a snippet of the Ginger Training & Coaching Staying Motivated programme for organisations. It's already worked well for groups of lawyers and accountants, so it will work for many more groups. Please email biscuits@go-ginger.com or call 0207 3888 645 if you think your organisation would benefit from Staying Motivated.

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1 comment:

Unknown said...

Haven't read all the blog(s) yet but looking forward to doing so :)